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Health Forum    Mental Health
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 What motivates you to answer in this section?
When it's downright depressing?
Additional Details
Watch: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XLvDz1zkNX...

 How do you deal with a mother who is bipolar and manipulative?
She has alot of Highs and lows daily.
its seriously starting to get to me....

 At the lowest moment of your life was their anyone around to hold your hand or did you go it alone?
If you were alone how did you overcome?...

 How do you handle depression without medication?
How do you handle depresson without medication? I don't have any friends to talk to, cant afford therapy and walk almost every day....

 Would you live with a monster?
Im 31 Bipoler with a personality disorder. I have a Monster in my brain named depression. I have been on tons of meds lots of shrinks and when it comes down to it they say only I can make myself ...

 Serious Question: Do You Have a Drug Addiction?
I'm just looking to see who else on YA is struggling with addiction. I'm addicted to vicodin. I have been hiding my addiction from my family and friends for about one year. Looking at me,...

 My friend wont eat........(serious answers only!!!!)?
she has been starving her self. and she is my best friend. she is about 5 8. and REALLY thin. she allways depressed. what should i do? we are both teenagers. and she has a horrible relationship with ...

 Cannabis and psychological illness?
Does cannabis actually cause psychosis? Does anyone who uses it, or know someone who uses it, feel they have suffered problems due to smoking it?...

 How safe is withdrawal?

 Is it okay to cry??
I want to but I don't want to. And I don't know what to do?? I bottle up all of my emotions and it hurts....

 Why is suicide said asif it is a crime?
people say "commited suicide" asif it were against the law ,but it is your own choices and your own lyf. If animals were suffering we would put them down thats not against the law, so why ...

my partners depressed and has stayed in bed for about a week now, he refuses to talk to me about anything and when i try to talk to him about it he yells and throws things about, im getting seriously ...

 What is the right way to getout depresion?
hi i am anshul age 23 years i am sufeering from depresion last 5 ...

 How do I stop taking drugs?
I have tried to stop but keep on doing ...

 Molested by Uncle What Should I Do?
I was molested when i was around 8 and 9 by my uncle and i neaver told anyone that was close to me not even my mom i am 16 now its eating me up inside to keep something like this a secret he told me ...

 What can i do to feel better?
i am so hopeless.i am only getting worse i dont like it
iam so depressed
Additional Details
i am thinking about suicide a lot
i am struggling alot
i try to feel better ...

 My friend wants to commit suicide. Please help?
My friend is really suicidal and I don't know what to do to help him. It's happened a few times when he was going to and rang me to tell me and I convinced him that he shouldn't. I'...

 Has anyone heard of taking Prozac for ADHD in a 14yr old.?
If you have ADHD would this really help or make it worse? He was taking adreal when he lived with us. We he moved back with his mother they changed it to Prozac, i think, they are blue and white ...

 Is Prozac the best anti-depressant out there, or should I try something else?
I get really depressed for no reason but also I have severe anxiety as well when ever there is a lot of people around rushing and stuff. Are there good medicationa for those two things?...

 Do antidepressants change your personality? do they suppress healthy emotions?
ever since i started taking them i cant seem to "fall in love". i know it sounds stupid but i feel so ambivalent and it's driving me crazy. i also don't feel really happy anymore. ...

tangerine(R.I.P. Paul Newman)
How can I be a happier, less serious person?
I have a history of depression, ADHD, and anxiety. In fact, I take Effexor XR, and it does alleviate a lot of my symptoms. That being said, though, I'm still not exactly happy. During my childhood, adolescence, and early adulthood, I was constantly bullied. I'm not trying to make myself out to be a victim, but it certainly does leave a mark. I consider myself to be a rather serious, tense person. I also have very few friends, because I'm rather shy and introverted and I usually keep to myself. I guess I'm also what some might term "different". I would like to be a happier, more carefree person and I would like to fit in more easily in groups. How can I achieve this?

I know this isnt what you would want to hear nor is it standard practice or advice but...

Instead of taking all those meds...do you think for once..seriously you can try smoking a joint? Just once and see how you feel..if you dont like it or it doesnt do what you want it to do just discontinue it. I wished i could smoke at least once every 6 months but my job does the pee test. Id be so much happier and one lasts me for a week or two which is good. I used to feel more relaxed and carefree but i was still responsible and attentive after I finished.

Jake B
Go to a doctor and get stronger drugs. Maybe become an alcoholic.

I was molested, ignored, beat up daily in school, made fun of, friendless, alone, all through my tween-teen years, and i certainly didnt let it effect the rest of my life.

Holy crap woman, at some point you have to move on and get past the past and live a little.

How can you possibly have the energy to give a crap about anything more than enjoying your life?

You decide how things effect you, and how you are shaped by them. Why would you decide to let it bother you into adulthood?

Move on, live life.

You can either be a caring compassionate person who relates to the pains of others and reaches out to help them, or you can be introverted and isolated by the events you suffered as a child. Its your choice what you do with yourself and how youre effected by the past.

just try singing some silly songs!?!

you can achieve it by just letting go. Whatever it is that bothers you, you need to push it to the side. Go get your hair done (in a stylish way) Get your makeup done (by a professional) And take one of your friends and go out. Feel pretty after all that pampering you have done for yourself.

Gee, seems I just read about myself, so I know exactly how you feel. My mother is always telling I shoulding be such a loner. I have a husband and 2 kids. So I value my time alone. I am currently taking Cymbalta and 3 other meds. They have helped alot. I seem to change when I am around a group of people outside of my home. I join in conversations or games and have a good time and talk. It seems to work for me. When I first arrive say to a party or bar where we are meeting friends I am quiet at first and seem to have to warm up and then I fall right in with the whole surroundings. I am bipolar along with adhd. I know how it feels. My dr suggests me seeing a therapist to talk with so I have an appt next week. You might want to think of doing the same. Keep your chin up.


Your problem is that you're afraid to do anything uncommon as you don't want anybody to bully you as you were before. Please keep in mind that your friends, family and people around you aren't so childish as your friends when you were young.

People learn to be tolerant with time and they even like a person who's fun and who doesn't take his life too seriously. When you're too serious, you're making the others feel under pressure as they have to stay at a decent state of mind. Show them something else and they'll follow you, if they don't, you won't be the one having a problem anymore, they will be...

If you want to be happy you need to kill that bug up your @$$. Seriously though, I was also bullied throughout my childhood and adolescence, and while you're right about it leaving a mark it's up to you how you deal with it. Think of it as an arrow with a poisoned tip -- you can either pull it out and get rid of it or let it sit in there so the poison can continue to work its way into your system.

It took me a long time to learn this, so let me pass it on to you so you won't have to take the same painful journey I did: The people who bullied you were cruel, insensitive, and immature. Having said that, I'm willing to bet a month's pay that YOU have also been cruel, insensitive, and immature to others at some time in your past -- or now. That's just the way people are. You can take those attacks against you personally, or you can see them for what they really were -- a desperate attempt to fit in and a typical display of underdeveloped human behavior. Those people are not a part of your life anymore, so they can't hurt you anymore unless you let them. And as long as you harbor a grudge against anyone or everyone who has wronged you, it's YOU that ends up getting hurt. Don't let them hurt you anymore. Just realize that they're every bit as human as you are and let the past go. Make up your mind that YOU are in charge of how you feel and YOU have decided not to let the past bother you anymore. Better yet, make up your mind that YOU are looking forward to what the future holds for you -- heck, you can even tell yourself that your past $ucked so it can only get better from there.

Perfect segue into my next point: You are responsible for your own happiness and well-being. No one or nothing else can make you happy. That's all on you. I'm guessing that you have deep-seeded feelings of not being "good enough" because you're shy and introverted and "different" and suffered abuse during your formative years. Here's another lesson it took me a long time to learn that I want to pass on to you: No matter what you do or what you accomplish, until YOU believe that you are a good, valuable human being you'll never be good enough for yourself. You'll always be your own worst enemy. It's one thing to be your own worst critic because critics point out the good things as well as the bad and offer constructive criticism as to how the "bad" things could be made better. In your case, however, I'm betting you always see the negative in yourself and you always let it get you down. DON'T!!! It's not an easy thing to do, but you have to remind yourself every day that you are valuable (God wouldn't have made you if you weren't) and teach yourself not to look to others for affirmation of your self-worth. You'll always end up hurt and disappointed if you do that. I don't know you personally, but I know if you're not a criminal or a child molester you're a good person, you're a valuable person, and you have something to offer to the whole world (and you probably have a lot to offer to the right member of the opposite gender). And that is exactly what you need to tell yourself EVERY DAY, multiple times every day if necessary. Those who bullied you told you that you were a loser and that you were worthless, and the problem is you started to believe them. It's time to de-program yourself and install a new program. If you keep telling yourself that you are good and valuable, after a while you'll start to believe it, so do it and keep doing it until you believe it.

As for being shy and introverted, I have an extreme suggestion for you. You're worth the time and effort to get over your shyness, right? So believe in yourself and take that leap of faith by getting involved with your local chapter of the Toastmasters. Yes, you read right -- I'm suggesting that you cure yourself of being shy by getting into public speaking. Look, even if the prospect is terrifying, I can tell you from experience that it can be done. And if I can overcome my fear of public speaking and actually learn to be good at it, ANYONE can. Do you have the guts? I bet you do. I bet you can do it, and I bet you'd be good at it. It may sound scary, but you'll find that the rest of the people at the Toastmasters meetings were in your shoes many times, so they will only have positive, helpful feedback for you. They'll instantly respect the fact that you are brave enough to venture where the vast majority of the population would never DARE to tread -- speaking in public is numero uno on the average person's list of fears according to recent Gallup polls. Not only that, it's a good place to make friends. It IS do-able. You CAN do it. Give it a try.

So let's review, shall we?

1. Don't let the demons of your past haunt you anymore.
2. Make up your mind that YOU are going to be in charge of your attitude and YOU have decided that you're going to be happy.
3. Get over your introversion by placing yourself in a situation that forces you to be an extrovert.

Good luck! P.S.: Don't forget that you CAN do it and that you ARE worth the time and effort.

hi i know what you are going threw i am the same way i am on effexior to i dont have many friends either so i try. going out like grocery store i started talking to anybody like i start. what abt the weather or man aint gas high now. or i listen to what people talk abt and try to be helpful. anything it gets easier try to smile at people or say hi how are you. hows your day going? and being bulled well you know that saying what comes around goes around and its true you sound nice get out there and get over your shyness you got a mouth trying being happy outgoing and be yourself i am sure people will luv you you got to give them a chance to know you and trust me they are some smartbutts out there dont let it bother you maybe they are having a bad day so get out there and enjoy your life i know you can good luck

I Feel Like Sunshine
My advice would be to first let those things go from your past. If you hold on to all that stuff it weighs you down and keeps you from living in the present. Sure it leaves a mark and hurts, but you need to forgive and forget and put it behind you in order to focus on moving forward, not letting what happened define who you are now.

I believe happiness is a choice, no matter what is going on in one's life. It's how you look at things. To be truly carefree you can't sweat the small stuff and this will require a certain amount of opening up, taking a few risks, stepping outside your comfort Zone-A little, and letting go. If you can do that then you are one step closer to achieving your goal.

The fact that you WANT to change is the first step. I would suggest getting some professional help but also get in a club of people your age doing something that you enjoy or would like to learn (dancing, art class, something like that). When you have common interests with people it makes it easier to open up and talk to them especially when they're strangers to you. Through the learning process, coupled with the professional help, you could see a positive change in yourself very soon.

We were all picked on and made fun of in school. Kids are mean, we all know that. Don't let something some snot-nosed brat did or said to you ruin your life. You're more than that. Enjoy being yourself.

Good luck and don't forget to smile! :)

Get a nice T-shirt with an inscription 'LAZY'....
Thats all!

Don't let your self be a victim. Try thinking of why or what kind of background that person came from by saying mean things to you. Also, childhood is all about being pushed around, it is just supposed to build character and make you a stronger person, you just can't let those things get to you. Just try to keep a positive attitude and let those things just make you stronger.

Try laughing at more things, find humor in everything. Don't look at everything with a straight face. Compliment a girl you may want to befriend on something that day. The compliements will come back to you, and make you feel better...you may also see if they would like to do lunch sometime, so they can get to know you better. Try opening up to someone close to you, if you do it more often, then it will be easier in the long run.

Another thing, is maybe going on craigslist.com to try to find a group you may be interested in joining. Is there a meetup.com in your area that you are able to be social in groups with? It is usually a bunch of people that like to go out to dinner once a month and see a movie.

See what works for you!

Good luck!

Fazia B
well i would just find my safe place you know go in your living room and listen to soft music just pamper yourself

You really have a lot going on. Are you from divorced parents? I am. For a while I suffered from depression and self medicated with alcohol and drugs. Then I decided to best combat depression, I would just try to be happy.

I put makeup on every day so that I feel better about myself.
I acknowledge my physical health and give thanks to God.
I dress well for my body type (short and 15 lbs overweight) so that I look professional, likeable, and better about myself.
I listen to upbeat music everytime I am in my car. (I personally think that even though I was 36 at the time, Good Charlotte, Fall Out Boy, and New Found Glory saved me from having to take Prozac.)
I go to Mass (I'm Catholic and proud of it) every Sunday no matter what, and get fed (my soul).
I joined a Wednesday Bible study to meet friends.
I became a volunteer at a Crisis Pregnancy Center.
I go to the beach as often as I can for Sun Therapy.

Look your best, treat yourself to clothes that look good on you and make you feel good.
Volunteer: giving of yourself is not only nice, it makes you feel good about yourself. In helping others, you are actually helping yourself, you won't believe it until you try it.
Get ongoing therapy: you really need someone to talk to from a psychological standpoint
Go to Church! Everyone has this big void to fill, the void you feel is from missing God.
Pray for healing.
Don't be a victim anymore and scratch all the bad stuff. Maybe become proactive in your local Victims of Violent Crime or other organization that assists victims.

Last Call
Ohmigod, you've articulated what I go through so perfectly. I cannot believe someone else goes through the exact same thing I go through every day of my life. I have a history of bipolar II disorder, which brings with it anxiety and obsessive-compulsive tendencies. I also have learning disabilities in math and some cognitive functions (reading comprehension, mostly). I take Tegretol XR, which has been a blessing in alleviating a lot of my symptomatic behaviors. Like you, I was bullied so much between the ages of 10-16ish that it really cut deeply and scarred me emotionally for almost 20 years. I've learned recently (and am still learning) that I've let myself become a victim of my past pain; therefore, it's prevented me from moving forward and living in the now. I've let past experiences affect wonderful things happening in my life as a 28-year-old woman, such as my committed relationship with my boyfriend of close to five months, most notably. He's taught me that I have to face my demons head-on by setting time aside often to think about my past and how it's affected me; it's incredibly painful and I've gone through a lot of crying (alone and in front of him), but it really helps. I now can rationalize that those people who hurt me simply aren't worth my time and chances are, they don't even remember/nor know the effect they had on me. And it just doesn't matter anymore. I believe strongly that once you are able to face your demons and get rid of them, then you'll find it much, much easier to fit in more easily in groups. I don't think you'll feel comfortable doing so if you don't face your past fully and cast it aside.

Please don't hesitate to send me an e-mail if you'd like to talk further.

i think what you really want is a little confidence in your self... pamper yourself, look good to feel good, go to the parlor for makeover then go to where there are lots of people, show them how pretty you are... love your body... appreciate even the simplest thing you have, being happy starts deep within yourself...
good luck!

Brace Face
do fun stuff and joke around to make your self laugh.
good luck!

samantha j
try and look at the glass as half full!!!! make yourself interested in something or take an interest you already have and meet people who like the same things as you! or even people who hav gone through things like you have! x x

Well, you say you don't want to make yourself out to be a victim.....but that's exactly what you are doing. You're a victim. So you were bullied when you were a kid. You were bullied in early adulthood--were you in a bad relationship with someone? The point is that you need counseling. Antidepressants are ONLY meant to get you through counseling. They are not meant and cannot fix the problem. While they alleviate some of your symptoms, your problems are all still there.

Katie L
I wasn't necessarily bullied as a kid but I was made fun of a few times, laughed at, betrayed, whatever. Stuff that is normal but leaves a mark for sure. I'm very shy and I hate meeting new people. I have a difficult time trusting my own friends for whatever reason. I don't know a lot about ADHD or depression, but I do know that the second something went wrong in my life, I knew exactly who my friends were. They were there for me in a second, listening to me and advising me if I asked. Surprisingly, every single one of my 10 friends were there calling to let me know they were there if I needed them. Be confident that you picked some trustworthy people and start opening up to them. My guess is that the few friends you have don't know much about you. If your friends don't laugh at you or scoff at whatever you tell them and they listen with an open mind, you will probably get a little more confident. It gets lonely and sad in the little world of your mind. It also gets very paranoid. Our minds like to tell us that no one wants to hear what we have to say or that people only pretend to like us you'll realize that isn't true once you start opening up to your friends.

PS- It's ok if you don't have a lot of friends. Better to have a few really awesome friends then to have a million acquaintances

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