If I say...I am a virgin?

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julissa s	i was just like u when i went they asked and i said i was then when my doctor came in, she told me she cant tell ne thing to my parents so i told them the truth. they can tell. i forget wat its called but they can tell. but idk..when my friend went she was having sex alottt and they told her parents. for me they cant tell. i live in maryland too. some say it depends where u live. when i went, i didnt have sex 3 for 3 months cuz i new i was goin. ask them if ur mom is gonna know b4 u tell them ne thing. good luck. it isnt too bad, just not somethin to enjoy Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

☆♥Violet Hope♥☆	if you dont want your mom to find out that means that you are too young to be engaging insexual activity. i lost my virginity at 14, not something im proud of but its part of my past and im not ashamed, just disappointed in myself. i didnt tell my mom either, she found out when i went to the gyno a year later and they asked. she wasnt mad or anything, it actually helped because she bought me bc and condoms and things i needed. im now 23 years old and i just got engaged to the guy that i lost my virginity to. i have only had one partner and so has he, eachother. we have however decided to stop having sex until our wedding night. i really think that if you are so ashamed of being sexually active you should stop. and yes they can, especially if you have had sex multiple times because you will be looser than a person who hasnt had sex. just tell the doctor and maybe your mom should know too. think abut it though, they learnt forin a university and you actually think that they would be ignorant enough to not be able to tell that you are indeed sexually active??? good luck! :D Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

kenspring12	no not really Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

toastandsausage	its safer to tell them. what difference does it make? do you think the gyno is going to run out of the office and scream to your mum "YOUR DAUGHTER ISNT A VIRGIN, OH DEAR LORD!!!" no. he/she has seen/heard it all before and it's illegal for them to tell your mother or anyone else except you anything. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

lissylivvy	Just tell them, they're not allowed to pass that info onto your mum. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

kate	they can tell if your hyem is broken but that can be broken by different things such as playing sports, riding a bike or riding a horse. if you dont want your mom to know then tell them no while she is in there but you can tell them privately and they will tell her that its just proceedure othing to worry about and tell her to step out of the room but your doctor really should know if you are having sex Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Insert Name Here.	Doctors aren't allowed to tell your parents what you tell them. Its against the law. I would really tell the doctor the truth. Doctors can not tell if you are a virgin or not. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Katie S	Woah woah woah is your mum coming along with you? Because the gynecologists swear to confidentiality, they wouldn't tell your mum. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

♥♥♥Jonas Fan♥♥♥♥	no, I dont think so. BECAUSE your hymen, my sister broke hers while RIDING A BIKE, I was there, I should know, Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

GlamGurl	Don't lie to the doctor. It is very rare that he will tell your mom. Just to be on the safe side, request that he respects your confidentialty and disclose any of the facts that you've given and the procedure to your parents. They frankly don't care what you do. I've been to a gyno before and he didn't care how old I was or how many times I'd had sex. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

greengo	Don't lie to your doctor. Plus, your doctor is not a fool and we know that half the girls are lying to us, LOL. Just keep your mother out of the room so you can be honest about your health. This is a HEALTH issue. You can tell sometimes, but only if the sex has been recent. For example, you do the scraping and look at it under the microscope, and HEY what are those SPERM doing there? But hardly any girl has a hymen these days, due to sports, tampons, and etcetera. So most of the time, you can't tell. Lying is dangerous to your health. Like if you were exposed to meningitis, would you LIE about it or would you want to get treated so you won't die? Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

joshilover_7307	no there's no way of finding out. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Trust me.	no they can't be cause your hymen can be stretched by masturbation or any physical activity even if they do believe you are not a virgin the gyno can't say anything Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Undecided in Life	I don't think there is a way that they can really find out if you are a virgin or not. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

summerloving<3	If your mom doesn't go in the room with you; I'd just tell them. They aren't aloud to say anything to your mom. its all confidential. If she does, just lie.. and they may find out.. but they wouldn't say anything.. But its best if you dont have to. so they do everything right. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

SteFF	they can't really tell i don't think but it's important that you tell them the truth. i didn't want to tell either, not because of my parents, just because it felt awkward. where i live they are only allowed to tell your parents if it is something that is putting you in danger or if you are really sick i think. just ask them not to say anything to your parents, im sure they will respect that Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

jemma	i doubt they could. they may be able to see if anythings 'broken', but this can happen through so many other ways so im sure they cant be 100%. Also, everything should be confidential so dont worry about it. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Lucifer's Kitty	Well they can't see that you are or not, but you shouldn't lie to them. Its a law they can't tell your parents unless they get your consent. So just tell them, they can't legally tell your parents. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

rule62	Your hymen could be broken for other reasons, like vigorous exercise - mine broke when I was 9 and no, I wasn't sexually active. Ask your gyne frankly if your info is confidential and if he/she can tell your parents. You should never lie to a doctor - never. How can they help you? Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Martyna .	They can see if your hymen is broken, but that does NOT always mean you had sex or anything like that. The hymen can be broken from lots of things like horseback riding or sports or tampons, etc. There's no button inside the vagina saying that this girl isn't a virgin, that's a myth. ASK YOUR DOCTOR ABOUT HIS CONFIDENTIALITY AGREEMENT! Sorry for the caps, just wanted to get attention. It's a myth that all doctors in the US are required to keep things confidential between parents and minors under 18. Yes, most states have a law that doctors have to keep things confidential, but I couldn't find a website that lists those states so it doesn't hurt to ask. Most doctors will keep things confidential anyways to insure complete honesty so they can have the whole story when treating you, and if it's something life-threatening will tell the parents. It doesn't hurt to ask the doctor to be absolutely sure that things will remain confidential, and if so then you should tell your gynecologist that you're not a virgin. That way if they see signs of an STD they can treat you. Check out these websites. They're pretty interesting on the issue of teen confidentiality and parental rights. http://www.advocatesforyouth.org/PUBLICATIONS/iag/confhlth.htm http://kidshealth.org/teen/your_body/medical_care/talk_doctor.html Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

McBush	What country are you in? Cause in the US, a doctor can not tell your mom or anyone else anything medical about you. No matter if your 15 or 30. Be honest with your doctor and ask him ahead of time and tell him you do not want your parents to find out. You could sue his *** off if he did. Now with that said, your hymen can break from a lot of things, (tampons,riding a bike, riding a horse,) mine broke from a tampon, funny story i had not had my monthly yet and i was Curious about tampons. i put one inside me, it hurt like hell, and i almost couldn't get it out cus it hurt so bad. anyways after i got it out i saw blood, i thought it was my period. and i never told my mom what i did. it wasn't until years later after i had sex for the first time and i didn't bleed that i realized what had happened. So dumb at that age. anyways, a doctor can not tell your mom anything. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

SHE said THIS dosnt HURT!	no they cant tell becuz your hymen can get broken from a number of other things too but you should still be honest and tell the truth ... they wont have to tell your mom if u ask them not to ( = Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

FaBriZee	A doctor will be able to tell if you ARE a virgin, but they cannot say whether you've actually lost your virginity or not because it's possible to break ones hymen without having sex (such as riding a bike, using a tampon, some type of accident, etc.) They will be able to see if there is scarring or tearing which can determine rape or molestation. Either way, doctor confidentiality will prevent them from telling your parents. I only think in rare situations (such as molestation or for health purposes, or if you are very young) will they tell your parents. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Hello	no, they can't, if they found scratches or anything they don't know if it could be from anything else like tampons, masterbating etc Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

HuggyBunny4Her	There are a few ways a gynecologist can tell if you're not a virgin: 1) if you have children with you who are obviously your own... 2) if your hymen is basically gone because you've given birth... 3) if you're pregnant... 4) if you have semen inside your vagina... or 5) if you have a disease that can only be contracted by sexual contact. That's it. Oh... there's one other way: if he asks you and you're not a virgin, telling him the truth will be a dead giveaway. Telling the truth to your doctor is the only way possible for them to know how to help you keep your body healthy, so you should either tell the truth or don't bother having a doctor. It's none of your mom's business and if you ask the doctor not to tell her, he won't: he can lose his license to practice for breaking patient confidentiality rules, and in some states, he can be prosecuted criminally for it. (Besides, he's interested in your body's health and in billable procedure time, not in your mother's moral opinions). Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

ACM	A gynecologist can tell if your hymen has been broken although the cause cannot neccesarily be linked to sex, i.e, tampons, riding a bike, masturbation, etc. can all break the hymen. Legally and ethically your doctor must respect your privacy and cannot report your sexual activity to your mother unless it involves sexual abuse or behavior that is putting you in harm's way and even in cases such as the above he may still have to refrain from telling her depending on the laws where you live. The important thing to remember is that you should be completely open and honest with your doctor because sexual activity has risks including, but not limited to, cervical cancer, sexually transmitted diseases and of course pregnancy (which I would conisder a risk if you are young and not ready to be a mother). It is absolutely necessary to begin having yearly Healthy Woman Exams (Pap Smears and visual and physical examination of your vagina, cervix, uterus and breasts) to prevent some of the risks above and to discuss birth control options. In addition, since you obviously cannot have an open and honest dialogue with your mother then your doctor can help advise you on safe ways to practive sex and keep yourself healthy now that you are sexually active. Don't be afraid to tell your Mother that you don't want her in the room with you; just explain to her that you are old enough to see the doctor alone and that you are self-concious about having her see you in such a vulnerable position. If she argues with you just stand your ground and the doctor's office should support your decision because it would be clear to them that her presence would inhibit your honesty and your health is their main priority. Good luck! Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Shishkani	They can suspect it from the condition of your hymen, but they cannot know for sure. One thing you should do is call the clinic before you go, sometime when your mom won't overhear, and ask them their policy on patient confidentiality for underage patients. In some states they are required NOT to tell your parents; while in others they are required to report certain items like underage pregnancy. Again, call and ask, they will let you know. I don't think it's a law in ANY state that they HAVE to tell your Mom, so you can request that the doctor keeps it private no matter what your state's laws are, and she will most likely respect that request. In either case it's not a good idea to lie to the doctor. Some things are normal for women who have sex that might be abnormal for women who don't. It can affect your doctor's choices of which tests you need to have as part of a routine screening. When it comes to the health of your lady bits, you should not compromise - tell your doctor the truth. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Iron Maiden's Gonna Get Ya!	I wouldn't have thought so, because even though everyone is saying "yes they can because your hymen is broken" there are loads of ways this can happen, and the same goes for other signs... there can be a number of explanations for them. I would go with the person above who says you should tell them though, since they have to be screening for the right things etc they shouldn't tell your mum, just tell her you would rather she didn't come in with you xx Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Dragonfly	They could be able to tell if you are if you hymen isn't broken, but sex isn't the only thing that breaks it so if it isn't there then they can't tell one way or the other. Your ob/gyn should know if you have been having sex though, just get your mom out of the room first, ask if you can tell them something without them telling your mom and if they say yes then tell them you have been having sex. They may want to check for std's if you have been having sex, even if you have no symptoms of one it is possible to have one and the sooner you find out about it the better. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Liana	I would tell them the truth. The reason they ask that is because they want to make sure that they are screening for the right things. There is such a thing as doctor confidentiality and they don't normally tattle on you. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

MSS	No we can't tell if you are or you are not during an exam. But if you have some starches or something like that, we can just suspect it is. But, it is always better to say the truth because sometimes some stretches and tearing happen because of sex. If you said you never had sex and you have a tearing the doc might think it is very usual. During bi-manual exam it is always better to tell the truth. Note to others here: the "hymen isn't broken" theory is not always true because some women born with no hymen and some have broken ones due to masturbation or high physical activities, which is normal. I have done 4 exams now and I have seen one without a hymen and she never ever had sex. (we are sure-these girls are university controlled subjects.) Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No