purplev
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I'm not sure of the complete situation that you were in but i was in a similar situation when i was your your age.
I was also at a party i should not have been at had a guy put pressure on me to have sex i said no but he continued to pressure me i became very scared and had to give in and say yes because i thought he was gunna hurt me if i didn't say yes. Yes it was rape but i think dragging it through court would have been worse for me. I live with wondering whether he ever did it again but like you i never knew who he was. You need to know how you will live with what decision you make but i could strongly advise you talk to your mum and see how you go from there. i never told my mum and still to this day wonder what if
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tinker_bell
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OMG i cant believe that! i hope that guy gets caught go to one of your best friends who you trust and tell them and ask them to help you tell the police you need to get checked at the hospital you might of caught an infection
I'm sorry there are people out there who do this but remember its not your fault!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! how can it be your fault you wasn't asking for it were you!
I hope you do the right thing
Tinkerbell
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~15 wks along with baby # 4~
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Well ..I highly doubt that your parents are going to focus on the fact that you were drinking when you tell them you were raped!!!! I am not saying later they may not talk to you about your drinking but my goodness girl you SHOULD TELL THEM!!! They will help you and tell you what you need to do next.
-Just bc you dont know who it was doesn't mean you can't find out. There could have been witnesses or anything.
-because you had a shower, it doesn't wash away all the evidence of rape.
-and you being drunk and outside on your own DOES NOT EVER give someone the right to rape you!!!!!!!!! No one will blame you.
-an examintaion can be uncomfortable but it is something I think you have to do.
Just be brave..come forward b4 it happens again.
You could save someone else from what you are going through!! if you keep this inside you, it will only hurt you in the end. Talk to someone. If you can't go to your parents yet, try a counselor or someone like that.
Good luck!!!
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luckylindywho
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First... tell your parents... second go to the hospital so they can do a rape kit. If you do it soon enough there will be evidence. Doesnt matter if you showered or not. Your parents wont be mad. when you tell them you were raped they wont even care about the drinking.. TRUST ME..They will just want to make sure that your ok and safe. So tell them
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Paige W
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they wont be upset!! tell them right now! dont tell them you were drunk though..they dont need to know that, dont tell the cope that either
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Morecambe, not Dennis Wise
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1) It was NOT your fault.
2) There will still be traces of his DNA under your fingernails. So it is still worth going to the Police.
3) If you don't report it, he could attack again.
To those accusing this lady of being a 'liar' - I have never seen the standards of Yahoo Answers stoop so low. I wish I could tell you what I really think about you but I'd only get reported for it.
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crazyorangesmoothies
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you need to tell your parents..
if you got raped, then i doubt that he used protection and you could get pregnet..or an STD
i'm not trying to scare you but it's the truth
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Britney B
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there not going to be upset
tell them then call the cops
fast,.
adn your gonna have to be you've been raped.
they wont blame you HE did it hes the monster not you. srsly tell your parents rite now befer anything happens!
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L Mendy
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I dont know if I should go to the cops either because
-I dont know who the guy was
Well they can go back to the scene and find evidence of DNA, your blood hair, his hair his sperm etc in the area.
-I had a shower so I think any evidence is gone
They would still be able to see the bruising inside you when you go to get examined. Plus his DNA is on ur clothes. DONT WASH THEM!!
-I was a little bit drunk and I was outside on my own when it happened so it was sort of my fault
It is never your fault. A woman does not asked to be raped- it wouldn't be rape. Her dress sense, her behaviour, her being drunk and unaware does not mean it is her fault. Never! Nice men and other people could have come to help you, and wouldn't have raped you because you were drunk. Please don't tell yourself it was your fault.
-I dont want to have to be examined at a hospital.
The hospital will be totally anonymous about this. As you'er 16 they don't have to tell your parents... unless your're in a state when sex is illigal til 18 yrs old. Plus they will be nice about it and Gentle towards you, they will not push anything.
This is the same with the police. You have already been raped by this man. The only thing THEY can do to help you is try to help you move on, become more confident and teach you to be more aware of people out this and ask you to help yourself and others. What you must do is tell them the truth. You must not let this man get away, because he will do it again, to someone else. And you can stop him. You can get him locked up. And for a long time he will be forced to live in a cage and know what he did was wrong while getting abuse from other prisoners (who will find out what he did) for raping a child.
Please tell the police... your parents don't need to know, but it is best you told them too... They will not care that you were drinking. They will care that their little girl has been hurt so much by a sick sick man. They will help you get through this more than anyone in the world, and they will help you put the man to jail.
Please don't let him get away with this.
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oohlaalaaa
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That's horrible :(
i understand how embarrassing and hard it would be to tell your parents- personally i wouldn't be able to talk to mine about something like that.
But you need to talk to someone about it. Try talking to a close friend.
You'll feel better talking to a friend about it and I'm sure a friend will support you, plus if you do want to go to the cops going with a friend would make it a lot easier.
It is not your fault at all- and if you go to the cops they're not going to blame you.
Good luck in whatever you decide to do, && i hope you get through it
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Judy B
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You need to report it and be tested for sexually transmitted disease. You will be also be referred to a sexual assualt centre for counselling and support. A support person will be there with you for the exam.
No one will blame you.
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michelangliron
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you were kind of a bit drunk and outside by yourself - those are NOT reasons for it to be your fault. You have the right to expect everyone to treat you with respect and decency. No way was this your fault, as you describe it. See someone, anyone , but SOON.
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Michelle K
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I am sorry for what some of these people have said but why would you lie about something like this?
I am a mother of two girls and if one of them cam e to me and told me something like this we would go to the hospital and talk with the cops..
I believe you and Good luck to you and your family with this
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Lia
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first of all, I am very sorry. Nobody should ever have to go through that. Do NOT keep it a secret and try to forget about it. Your parents might be mad about the drinking but getting raped it a much worse thing. There are many hotlines you could call that would be very helpful. You can get advice from professionals and it can all be annonymous. One is 1-800-656-HOPE. Another is (210) 349-7273. Another is 215-985-3333. Another is 1-877-739-3895. Another is 1-866-331-9474. Good luck! Sorry again!
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Adia
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Youre parents love you - they are NOT going to be angry at you, you havent done anything wrong. Youre their little girl, they would only be angry at him if anyone! They would understand how its hard for you to tell them and how youre scared. You MUST tell them. And DONT wash the underware or clothes you were wearing when it happened - they can find traces of his semen on there, plus if they examin you they will find bruising(internal) so you dont have to worry abotu that.. but you mustnt leave it. I know its hard for you but you MUST tell your parents. If he did it to you, what about other girls he is going to do it to? *hugs* Youve come this far.....dont let him get away with it. xx
P.S It is NOT your fault if you DONT CONSENT to sex. Drunk or not - if a girl says no, it means NO.
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john h
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Sweetheart, you must go to a Police station and take a friend with you ask to see a police woman and tell her what happened, nearly all police stations have a rape centre and there will be female police officers to interview you.
The reason that you must do this is for the following reasons, 1, you might have been impregnated and they can get you the morning after pill, 2 he might have had an infection 3 how would you feel if the same bloke raped one of your friends, some body must know his identity at the party
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kandigirl91
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report it! i have a friend who was raped and she never reported it and she has seen this guy almost everyday for years (she finally moved) but it kills her! your mom and dad will not be mad that you were drinking they will me more upset about the fact that you couldn't/wouldn't tell them!
but if you can live with the horror then go ahead but it would be wise to tell someone....
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(UK) DAVE
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go to the police now -you will still have dna on you and the place you was attacted do it now
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Lil'Wayne
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i know a guy named ____ _______ he like melesting/raping teenagers and is into that i dont know why i know him but i guess i just, if you are so scared to tell someone thats normal but still u should tell the truth
btw im 18
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*!_LuPy_!*
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they wont blame you you were the one that got raped the other guy just enjoyed it
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Kevin W
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Don't say it's your fault because that is silly.
You should tell your parents and get in contact with the police stop it from happening to someone else too.
I personally would slit the Mother Fu**kers throat.
I hope he dies of something really painfull.
Please don't deal with it on your own, Your family will be there for you.
Don't be victimized.
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kinda, sorta, fallen. <3
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go to the police. seriously.
if you dont that guy could rape loads of other people. maybe even younger than you!
also do tell your parents. its better they find out from YOU NOW. than to have them find out from SOMEONE ELSE some other time.
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MJ
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Your parents will definitely not be angry with you. You must tell them about this as you need to get this issue out in the open and discuss it with people, otherwise it will drive you crazy.
It was NOT your fault - don't ever think that. It was entirely 100% his fault.
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Ginny Jin
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Call the police now. There should still be evidence but call now before it is too late. Don't wash the clothes you were wearing.
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GR
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My daughter was raped. She did not tell me. She was at school and just broke down. The school counselor called the police and they called me. Thank god we got the guys who did it. Yes, you need to tell your mom and go to the hospital and get examined. There may still be some type of evidence. What if you have contracted a sexually transmittable disease or are pregnant? You will need counseling. People make mistakes. Now, you know why alcohol can be dangerous. Tell your mom right away. I think she will understand. I did. But, do get some help. Get tested for HIV too.
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truebeing3030
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This is not your fault!!! Tell someone right away!!!! Now!!!!! I know you will be ok! Just tell your self this!!!! Good luck!! Go tell parents now!!!
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DMC
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if ure telling the truth :
u have to get ureself checked out who knows what he has.
ure not going to report him? Let him walk free and rape more people?
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Karen
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YOU NEED TO GO GET THE MORNING AFTER PILL SO YOU DONT GET PREGNANT!!!
and everyone else has pretty much told you the rest.
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Singinganddancing
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Google "rape crisis center" and your city. Give them a call immediately, there should be someone there all the time.
Sweetheart, if you are ever raped, you need to get to a doctor before you do anything else, even though it's the last thing you want to do. You parents probably would have been more concerned about your pain than the fact that you had been drinking.
I don't know your situation, but consider telling them.
Also... if you go in for a pelvic exam right now, they might still be able to get some semen (for evidence) from inside you. A shower wouldn't necessarily wash it away. But you need to go immediately to the hospital.
Hang in there, sweetie, tell your parents. I'd want my daughter to.
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queenofdepression12
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call the rape crisis center, they have specially trained people there that can help you.
Don't be like me....it's 34 years after I was raped at age 16...I now suffer from Post Trumatic Stress Disorder, depression, anxiety and Bipolar disorder. I never got over it, and I'm in therapy now to stop having nightmares about it. I was a virgin, and it was awful. I felt dirty, like it was my fault, I was in pain, bruised inside and out. I still can remember it like it was yesterday....and this happend October 24th 1974.
Get help now. Feel free to email me if you'd like.
This has affected my life so badly that I actually have to be tranquilized almost into unconsciouness to give myself the courage to go see the gyn Dr once a year. I can't stand having anyone touch me....especially male Dr's....I was molested by a male ob/gyn, and that's another tragedy in my life...........
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