When should I tell by BF that I'm HIV +?

I hate myself for what I've done but it is so hard. I'm HIV positive and I've been with my boyfriend for 9 months. We have had sex a few times unprotective and I know he deserves to k...

I hate myself for what I've done but it is so hard. I'm HIV positive and I've been with my boyfriend for 9 months. We have had sex a few times unprotective and I know he deserves to know the truth. How can I do this?

Voodoo	Oh My Girl!!! You should of told him long ago. He is going to freak. I would get advice from an AIDS counseler, ask for his or her help. Sweet Baby, you can get into big trouble for not telling your partner that you have HIV. You got to tell him Sugar-VOODOO

Bald is beautiful	Here's a newsflash, sweetheart ... it's best to share this type of news BEFORE you have sex (unprotected or otherwise) with this guy!

xabercrombiex658	i think you should do it as soon as possible!

KC Girl	Oh my goodness, Please tell him that is completely dishonest. Can you imagine what it was like when you found out how could you leave him in the dark and deceive him like this. I'm usually nice but he obviously had trust in you, congratulations you just took someone's life If i were you i'd pray on it.

itsmylife	Reading your question, i feel you had sex when you didnt know about it and have recently discovered. Tell him immediately, he should test himself, accompany him and God Bless you. if he turns out to be negative, leave him alone hereafter , if you really love him

tampico	You need to tell him immediately.... it doesn't matter how you start the conversation, just start it!! I'm sure this is a hypothetical situation (at least I hope), because the seriousness of this could precipitate criminal charges against you for willingly exposing someone. It's no different than carrying a concealed weapon!!

shadow79812002	he should have already been told. i would tell him now so he can go and get tested.

just me	you need to tell him ASAP, the best way to do this is to ask him how he feels about HIV, try to understand his feelings about it, then tell him that you are positive.

kw3647	You need to tell your partner NOW!!! He does deserve to know about. Think of how you would feel if the role was reversed and he had it and didn't tell you...you should go to a clinic together to talk to a counselor. Maybe go by yourself first to get some ideas as to what to say to him. I certainly hope you have started treatment for the virus, which can prolong your health. You can even call an AIDS or HIV hotline to talk to one of the individuals who deal with this every day

spelling nazi	WHAT!?!?!?!?! What the hell are you doing, having unprotected sex with him????? Do you know you could be prosecuted and sent to prison for this???? You need to tell him right now, you selfish, immature little skank!!!!

so far north	You're kidding, right? Tell him NOW. Right NOW. Call him NOW. That's incredibly irresponsible of you, and you owe it to him to tell him immediately. You do understand that he could die, right?

Time@ Time	you neeed to tlk AsAp just talk

Joy	be straight up. the more you avoid the problem, the worse your gonna feel. I think you should just sit him down and tell him. thats about all I can say

Ann S	You should tell him now. In many states having unprotected sex when you are HIV+ without informing your partner is a felony. Call your local HIV clinic, ask when they do testing and what the cost is (usually free). Sit down, in person, with your BF and let him know you're positive. Let him know the reasons you delayed telling him, then give him time to vent and listen to his reaction. If you are worried about a violent reaction do it in public, like at a restaurant or coffeehouse or park. Afterwords you can go together to get him tested, or give him info so he can go on his own. He does not necessarily have HIV himself, as it doesn't transmit every single time - especially if you've been the receptive partner every time. However, he does need to know as soon as possible in case he has received the virus.

just_acali_girl	how can you even call him your boyfriend, and say that you love him when you have allowed this to go on! I hate people like you, do you know in Cali you could go to jail.. in fact prison for doing what you did? Its called attempted murder! No lie.. I had a friend that went to prison because he didn't tell his gf he had aids, and she died.. your sick!

markos m	Jane, I have no words to tell you the irreversible mistake that you made. You voluntarily exposed your boyfriend to a deadly disease....you have to tell him, you must tell him. Do your parents know of your condition. Today there are ways to control the disease, please seek medical attention, please. This is incredible!!!

juice	first of all you should be ashemed of not teliin him in the begining im gona leave it to you to get your self out of this mess... i cant believ you did that to him.. horrible.. seriously

Yup Yup & Shamrock's Revenge	Oh my God, that is illegal. You know he can sue you if he wants. My goodness if there is one thing that can quickly dissolve a relationship its finding out your partner is HIV +. You should tell him yourself and if you can't have a clinic contact him to let him know that he's been sexually involved with someone who's carrying the virus. I think this is every sexually active persons nightmare.

S H	First let me say, you should be ashamed of yourself. What in the hell is wrong with you? You are not mature enough nor responsible enough to be in a relationship because you lack the maturity and integrity to be HONEST. You are endangering another person with your negligence and stupidity. You also need to know engaging in sexual activities knowing you have HIV or other sexual diseases and not disclosing it to your partner is a FELONY and you can go to jail if he chooses to press charges. This is attempted murder since this disease has no cure and the inevitable is DEATH. I cannot stress enough the idiocy of your actions. If I were your bf, I would prosecute to the fullest extent. Therefore, I suggest you tell him NOW. Get off the damn computer and call him. Then, when you can learn to be open and honest to a potential sex partner, then you are mature enough to be in a relationship.

soberlunatic	I do believe that having unprotected sex with previous knowledge that you are HIV positive is highly inconsiderate and dangerous. However- HIV AND AIDS is no longer a death sentence. Tell him soon. Chances are you fear him leaving you, and you need to take the leap of faith and tell him asap to prevent losing him to death, infection, etc. Get help to go through it toether.

stephasoris	If this is a serious question... What you did was illegal and if he decides to...you can be charged with a crime...possibly murder.

J Baby	Wow...OMG!!!....Well I would start by telling him right now...telling him the complete truth...the longer you keep it from him, the harder it's going to be...but he should know...but omg this is so serious just tell him now ASAP!

The Deafening Silence	RIGHT NOW!!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON THE COMPUTER? GET ON THE PHONE AND TELL HIM! YOU THINK YOU FEEL BAD NOW, HOW HORRIBLE WOULD YOU FEEL IF YOU FOUND OUT THAT HE CONTRICTED HIV FROM YOU? DO THE RIGHT THING AND PLEASE TELL HIM. IF YOU LOVE HIME YOU WILL NOT HESITATE ONE SECOND LONGER!

Paul	If you knew you had HIV before you slept with him and didnt tell him, you seriously deserve to burn in hell. Otherwise, just tell him the truth. He most likely wont ever speak to you again so get ready.

Miss Krista Marie	First off, you need to be straight up with the people you are asking help from! Did you have sex with him BEFORE you found out you were HIV positive or AFTER. Because if you found out BEFORE you didn't state that and you're going to endure a lot of critisism because everyone is assuming the worst.. you had sex after you found out. You need to tell him. It's a legal right that he knows. He needs to get tested ASAP. You can tell him when you're drivng somewhere to avoid the akward eye contact, if you don't want that. But if not, a quiet remote location, if you love him tell him so, and tell him you're sorry. Be straight up. Don't put it off any longer. Hell, call him over right now and get it over with. It needs to be done, and soon.

Nicole B	Holy crap, you're HIV+ and had unprotected sex? Shame, shame, shame! You might be a murderer. Tell him NOW.

As Real As It Gets	I can't believe this. You should've told him long before you had ANY intimate contact with him or anyone else. Have you absolutely no sense of decency whatsoever?

Mr. Peachy®	If you're not kidding, you deserve to be locked up. If you are kidding, you deserve a thrashing. Shame on you.

thdweb	You need to tell him ASAP. If you have given him AIDS he''ll theed the treatment as soon as he can start it.

kirsten j	If you love him enough to stay with him, why would you risk killing him by having unprotected sex. Also, it is illegal and you can get charged with attempted murder or murder if he dies since you knowingly did it.

iroc	You are 9 months too late. I personally would cut you loose for the deception not the HIV. you have possibly destroyed an individual. brutal honesty is the only way to get through this as soon as possible.