Why am I always on the defensive? Whenever anyone says something I always take it the wrong way.?
This includes family members, people at work and even friends.Additional Details Thanks for all the answers. I haven't done anyt...
This includes family members, people at work and even friends.
Additional Details
Thanks for all the answers. I haven't done anything to be ashamed of but it does my head in when I'm like that.
Additional Details
Thanks for all the answers. I haven't done anything to be ashamed of but it does my head in when I'm like that.
alzghiasi |
You have problem with self confidence.You are defensive because you feel people who have different opinion than yours, telling you that you are stupid or are not right about the matter you are discussing.You should understand that you can be wrong sometimes and you are right sometimes.YOU can not be right ALL the time.Good luck |
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Justsyd |
Sounds like bipolar. |
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skiparoouk |
Possibly........... Persistent Maladaptive Response. ie. You 'go off on one' to anything and everything said to you - and you go the wrong way about it. Try looking at alternative ways to respond to people. Try asking yourself how other people might respond if *they* were asked/told the same thing. Look for a way to respond that YOU think is a BETTER way to respond. Look for a response that has a beneficial outcome. Maybe go and get some help if it's starting to cause you to lose friends etc. |
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Privratnik |
You're insecure. Its not that big a deal, you can get over it. Once you've recognized that its a problem, talk to your CLOSE friends and family about it. Tell them you're really trying to break old habits, and to please be patient if you overreact sometimes. Your friends and family can help by patiently reminding you that no offense was meant when you get defensive. Once your attention is on the problem, you'll naturally start to avoid repeating it, because you'll feel embarassed. It will take time, but it will get better. And congratulations on taking the first step to bettering yourself! |
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muffin |
http://kevan.org/brain.cgi?muffin8888 |
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Chrissi |
were you bullied at school ?maybe your being protective of your self .you are just as good as anyone else .take a deep breath and remember that each time you feel threatened. |
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splash |
Im the same ,for me its that i cant take critism a wall goes up and so does my defensives and anger and emotions, its like people are getting at me constantantly some times-though counselling is helping a lot, i have a long way to go .i have realised its cause is through lack of attention as a child ,being put down at school,being bullied,and an abusive relationship,what im saying is i believe there is a cause, does any of these figure with you?do you suffer from pmt?.I generally do it mostly with people i can get away with it but now it affects my work.Find a good counseller,if you dont like the first or second they wont be offended -shop around! good luck you can come out winning! it becomes a habit we have to change the tape in our head apparently!!this is just my oppion though,,thought it may help sharing my experience ,hope so!nobody can can tell you ,you have biopolar ,because you are defensive!!!!! dont listen to that **** please or worry, take care |
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Blunt Honesty |
Because you feel guilty about something you have done. You always think someone is accusing you of something, and they are usually right. |
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Nneave |
I can be like this sometimes, it is hard as people often react badly to it. For me it is a lack of confidence and self worth. Maybe councilling would help you. I'm not open enough to talk to people...another one of my problems. lol |
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Ya-sai |
Slight paranoia, only slight because you are aware you are being defensive. |
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pighed |
Because deep down you are gay, and you do not know how to deal with it or express your emotions and feelings. You should embrace your gayness and try to get a little bit more gay everyday. Cherish the things that make you gay, like kittens, teddy bears, your gay family, or the all of the gay times you share with your co workers and little gay friends. Oh, don't take this the wrong way, I'm not calling you a homo, I mean that you are happy and joyful deep down, but don't know how to show it. |
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MadforMAC |
It could be that in your past you felt that people were attacking you in some way and you are now always on the defensive. Best to go to a counselor and talk it out, see where it originated and then you can better deal with it. I am glad you recognize what is happening, that is the first step to changing your behavior. |
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***____ //_ \\_____*** |
try to be so sure about ur self ,try to have so me confidence , even some one tells u some thing so sillly u won't mind it coz u have enough confidence and so sure about ur self n don't care about any thing even if ppl reallly mean some thing |
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jaybug522000 |
You are probably insecure. Everyone has a right to their own individual opinion. Smile and they will never know what you really think or feel. |
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♥bentworth78♥® |
Get counseling in anger management |
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patriciaknoll@sbcglobal.net |
Insecurity usually leads to that behavior |
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lil_pinkmartian |
I am the same way...i think you are just protecting yourself from getting hurt of be put down...i was put down all the time when i was young so now I have become the same way you are |
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Pinky |
Have you been put down a lot by your family? Many times things like this start when we are young. Sometimes though, they start in the teens when our peers don't treat us right. You need to figure out why you are this way and then work to respond differently to people. |
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t10t200 |
you got a bee up your colon, fart it out.... then you'll feel much better. |
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devine_gem22 |
u are either a very sensitive person or u could be a bit depressed how long hav u noticed it? all ur life or just recent? x x |
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elainefromlondon |
HMMM... its a self esteem issue. You need to start having confidence in yourself and you will see that you will start to take things lightly. Also make sure you are eating well and regularly with plenty of fruits and vegetables.Also obtain vitamin b-Complex in large doses from the health shop and get plenty of exercise. If you dont like exericse. try to walk at least 7 miles twice a week. You will begin to feel much better. |
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Simple1 |
Sounds like a security issue...Or an insecurity you may have with yourself...the question to that is why??? What are you uncompfortable with?? Why are you holding a block up against your surrounding peers? Ask yourself......Good luck!! |
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Mike Hunt |
You are frustrated and you feel out of control with your own life. |
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mrsmoopydo |
I used to be like you ( still have the odd day). I think I've just grown a thicker skin as I've got older, and learnt to bite my tongue. |
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animalmother |
You must be a women. Also get off the coke. |
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luvins4me |
bi-polar.... |
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limcha_r |
start thinking that the world is not always wrong...continue to think the same until your mind accept it. |
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comeKK |
You're not bipolar. You should realize that others may have important things to say, and it is ok to be wrong sometimes. My daughter is the same way. I think it is because she wants to be liked so much, that she wants a reason for all imperfections no matter how trivial. She actually thinks very highly of herself, and for good reason. Just relax, you can't always be perfect, and right. You will always be a good person regardless of what people say or think. |
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Justinfire |
It's common to people to have these outburst. The best idea is to take it in a positive way than a negative way. Best to realize what the person is saying instead of jumping to conclusions. Before you react to the statement or whatever think about it carefully. The relationships be like a domino's if one goes it would eventually take all. |
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Cuts |
I am very defensive as well.....just had to learn to bite my tongue (when I can) until it sinks in and I take the criticism Just the way some ppl are! Oh and I'm proud - which I have been told results in the defensiveness...nout wrong with sticking to ur guns to a certain degree...try and rem the biting the tongue thou ! |
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Jochle |
lol dont listen to the bipolars, its just that you are an emotional person. Do you have a lt of stress in your life? and are you doing things that you know that your family or friends to not approve of? If so that may be the problem. Otherwise i would find something to trust, who u can work with and talk to everytime you feel this way. Trust me it helps. My suggestion is God, bc he's always there no matter the time or situation and he makes you feel awesome! |
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