Friend cutting please help?

My best friend is cutting herself and I'm so scared. I don't want her to kill herself I would miss her. She just says she gets so upset and cuts and pops pills. I love her and would never fo...

My best friend is cutting herself and I'm so scared. I don't want her to kill herself I would miss her. She just says she gets so upset and cuts and pops pills. I love her and would never forgive myself if she died. I told her not 2 kill herself and she said she won't. I don't know what 2 do. I know alot about cutting because I used to cut myself but I don't anymore. I told her she can always talk 2 me because I have been there. What do I do? I can't tell her family she will never talk 2 me ever again if I do. I know cutting is not about killing urself it's about getting the pain to leave. PLEASE HELP ME
Additional Details
We are both 17. I know about cutting because I did it for 4years and stoped Please don't be rude.

carolynjlalena	If you really care about her life then tell her parents!!! If she lets your go as a friend, you'll probably get her back when and after she understands her problem. (Which is not you) Besides would you rather her not be able to get well cause well, she'd just be dead!!!

lost	my friend is a cutter and she hasnt stopped she has been put on pills and everthing else does her family know? most people dont tell their families she has to want help to reach out and get help

Arturo D	Time to get help, regardless of whether your friend wants to admit it or not. Someone in authority needs to know....A Teacher, a counselor, parents, doctor, etc. Your friend is crying out for help and you might be the only one to save your friend.

Mira	Listen, this happened to me. It is very very serious. You HAVE to tell her parents or an adult that cares about her. She will hate you for a while. But after it's all said and done, you saved her life. I promise you, me and MY friend are better than ever now, and all we have to show from that ordeal r a few of her scars and. . . shes alive=]!!

HillBillie	Sweetie, beacause you've been there you know. If she has that much pain in her she needs SOMEBODY mature to talk to. Please tell somebody older than you, with a little more living than you to talk to her. It doesn't have to be her parents. YOU CANNOT CARRY THIS ALONE.

bonnie m	do you want to tell her parents and deal with her being pissed at you or do you want to keep quiet and keep letting her hurt herself? i know it is a tough choice, but you have to think about what is best for your friend, and that is telling someone and getting her help. it may just be about making the pain go away, but what if it becomes about killing herself?

dippin.	I've had friends who did this too. You might tell your school counselor. She won't tell your friend who reported her.

prplfae	what got you to stop? maybe it will work for her too. just don't pressure her, it will upset her and possibley make it worse, she needs to stop on her own time. let her know your there for her and give her some suggestions, but thats about it, don't threaten to tell someone, don't try to make her do anything she's not ready for

Kris L	Are you the ONLY other person who knows your friend is cutting herself? Isn't there some CHANCE that someone else at school could know ... because if there is that chance, then you NEED TO TALK TO A SCHOOL COUNSELOR, and BE SURE the counselor knows to NEVER TELL that you are the person who 'told' on your friend. if your friend does find out it was you who 'told' then you may lose her friendship ... but YOU were a 'cutter' and since you are AFRAID FOR HER LIFE, I think that telling the school counselor is 'best' ... because she may hate you but she'll still be ALIVE, and someday, when she's fully in her mind again, she will probably forgive you and even thank you for doing this NOW. Go to the school counselor TOMORROW at the latest.

Vicky	Well I think you should call a help line that helps people deal with suicide. Go on the net and find one in your area and take your friend there. If she doesn't want to go and the situation gets worse tell her parents!! Because if she does attempted to kill herself then you will regret that you never told her parents.

†yle®	i would say that the best way for her to FOR SURE not cut its to spend a TON of time with her. build up good memories. make sure that she knows that you love her. and, if she spends all her time with you, she cant be cutting at the same time. and, if you make her happy, she shouldnt want to cut. i hope that she finds a better way to express herself. :) best of luck.

orlando	The mean posts here suggest that some people have no understanding of the motivations for cutting. I used to cut when I was your age. I used to do it when I had a feeling I couldn't deal with, when I was angry with myself, when I was sad because I didn't know how to deal with those feelings (and we all have them, especially at your age). It's a hard time. Anyways, the school counselor found out through friends and told my parents who sent me to a counselor. Honestly, though I was mad at the time, looking back I have so much love that my friends had the courage to tell her. And I have so much love for my parents for confronting me. To be a good friend, sometimes you have to do something that might make your friend mad. you have to take care of her by telling someone, even if she gets mad. I know you are scared about telling her parents, but imagine how sad they would feel if you didn't and if she did something more severe with the cutting (on accident) or with the pills. Even if she doesn't, she is in A LOT of pain. I'm not judging and I think people who haven't been through this have a hard time even beginning to relate. She needs people to stand up for her and show her that they care, even if she gets mad.

jay k	You really should tell someone about it. My friend used to cut himself, and I would always talk to him about it and he said the same thing that your friend did- that they would never commit suicide. A few weeks later I found out that he was in the hospital because of an unsuccessful suicide attempt(drug overdose). If he was successful at ending his life, I don't know what I would do. I wouldn't want that to happen to you, so please do the right thing and tell someone about it.

ash	I know you said you don't want to tell her family but sometimes if you can get through to her you have to. I think you are doing a great job of telling her she can talk to you. keep it up, and stay positive! :)

Piglet Love!!	I know this could make or break your friendship but you NEED to tell her to get help and if it doesn't work, you need to get help to her. Props for stopping though!

ssn_hamer	yiou need to speak to some one asap , get help for your friend , she must want it to confide in you

Selene	Go to a doctor and get her some help or tell someone that is a teacher or someone you trust and tell them whats going on and they should be able to help you out.

Michele K	there is probaly something wrong. like something bad happened and shes sad.

ashley m.	you should talk to her and let her know how dangers from personal experiences, and you should also talk to maybe a school counselor.

sololobo1979	sweetie just stopping like you did is not the normal pattern most of the time the pain gets bad enough where they do attempt suicide ... she needs help... tell someone... if not her parents, anonymously report to the school counselor or something but above all tell someone

LyricalLiesx3	the best way to help her is to get her help and be there for her which you're doing a great job at but as much as you seem to be telling and explaining why what she's doing is dangerous, it doesn't seem like she's accepting it. you need need NEED to tell her parents. its your responsibility as a friend to help get her help. a friend of mine was in a similar situation and she got mad at me for telling her parents [which i was afraid might happen just like you are now] but they got her into counseling and in the end she forgave me because she finally realized how she was hurting herself and everyone she loved. i know your friend can recover just like mine did! i wish you the best of luck and will keep you in my prayers.

kate86	im sorry that your in this position, i can honestly say that im not sure how you personally can help. but i think you should tell someone like a psychologist not her parents because the psychologist is there to help and is bond to confidential.

Lola =]	my friend cut.. he went to counseling. he doesn't do it anymore. counseling perhaps?? or just sit down and talk to her.

choir_kid9	wow. you should talk to your friend.. or tell her parents without out letting them tell her YOU told her.. i do that alot.. it gets the point across without you having to really be any part of it.. your friend will understand and love you in the long run.. atleast she wont kill herself accidentally

TwinkaTee	Why do you feel as if it is YOUR responsibility to fix your friend? You need to do the right thing, which is tell her parents. Maybe you can be with them when they approach her about it. Then, they can get her the help that she needs. She may be mad at first, but I would rather my friend be mad and not talk to me for a while, rather than her die because I was too scared to say anything....Plus, can you imagine what her family is going to feel if they knew you what was going on, but refused to tell them so they could help her.

matt	I am so sorry. This really is a family problem and she needs to speak with a professional counselor who can help her find a way to communicate her feelings without physical injury. She is holding a lot of stuff inside and doesn't know how to get it out. Obviously, there is a better way. The fact that her parents don't know is a sign they are not involved enough in her life. This could be part of the problem. I would encourage you to encourage your friend to tell her parents. If she refuses after several attempts or you know reasons why she shouldn't, then I would ask you to seek out the help of a local counselor in your area and you go talk to them about your friend. Find someone you'd be comfortable talking to and then, tell your friend about this counselor and see if she will go with you. That way, no one needs to know and she can still get help. Also, it's much easier not having to go through this alone. You are a good friend. I will be praying for both of you. A lot of people are telling you to be tough and to ignore your friend's request and tell her parents. I disagree but If you decide to do that, never do that behind her back. Always tell her first before you do something she has asked you not to do.

Lovely Coconuts ♥	I find cutting to be one of the most disturbing _addictions_ or illnesses one can deal with. Obviously something is going on in her head. Maybe she's had some sexual abuse or not enough love from her parents. Whatever the reason it stems from somewhere, and that is where the recovery process needs to begin. Offer to go to a therapist or counselor w/ her. It would be a good idea for you to go because you've been there and it would show your friend you care and are concerned. She needs to talk about her issues, talking about it helps tremendously. She needs to let that pain go, and she needs to know she is LOVED. That is the most important part. If it gets too serious someone will need to know. She's hurting inside and needs help. Talk her into getting treatment. Maybe you can both go through it together even though your not cutting anymore. Or talk to her about what made you stop, maybe that will help her. I wish you luck!

JustMe	If you told her family, you'd be doing what was best for her. Would you rather have her not speaking to you because she's upset with you, or because she's not alive? I have been a cutter for 11 years. She needs her family to know. There are even meds out there which could help specifically for that, I took Naltrexone specifically to reduce the cutting urge...even though I am not an advocate for meds, this one could be helpful to some. And to the person who said it's pathetic...you're pathetic.

Matthew	get her help! tell her parents. tell her teachers some one anyone.....i kno these 2 girls whose best friend was cutting and a week after they found out she committed suicide....make her see life is good.

Ladycat	I know you are trying to protect your friendship, but, unfortunately, if she kills herself with this behaivor, you won't get to talk to her again then either. It's not always easy to be the bad guy when it means that someone you care about will be mad at you or remove you from their life. But, if you truly care about her, then you will be willing to sacrifice your own feelings to get her the help she needs. If you just can't bring yourself to tell her parents, maybe there is someone else you can tell. A teacher, pastor, etc.? Someone you know she'll respect and who will be tactful enough not to tell her where they got their information (I'm sure you're not the only one who knows, even if she thinks you are). So I would say, give up the friendship if you have to to save a life. (Hopefully she'll realize someday how much of a friend you really are.)

sexxi cereal luva!	Maybe you can tell a principal in your school, or some other figure of authority. She could just be doing it for attention, but she could be very serious. Please tell someone. Tell them that is is VERY important to keep your identity a secret, and that you only tried to help your friend. If and when she tells you that someone talked to her about it, look surprised and act as if you know nothing about it. I know lying to your friends is wrong, but this is for her own good. You said you are worried about her and that you dont want her to kill herself. If she is being abused or something tell the police. Tell them to keep your identity a secret, and they will. This way she will stop cutting. Just do what you think is right for your friend. Good luck! ☺