Im a widowed father of 3 kids, (10,13,14) and have been diagnosed with cancer and recieving chemotherapy.?

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Dr. Charlie Love	Just be patient, man...adults are shallow enough, imagine little kids...its actually mature of them to assure you that they are not embarrased...we're all human, nobodies perfect, and they love you, and at that young of an age don't even fully understand how much they love you....just don't make a big deal out of it, and act normal...if you need to take them somewhere, do it. Everything always works out.... I'm saying a prayer for you right now. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

PIKA	well the 14 year old should know better & the yonger ones would behave if the 14 year old did. do they understand this means no shopping or eating out? Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Max Power	Irregardless of the chemo look, teenagers are always embarrassed being seen in public with their parents. Quick short story: Billy Joel was walking down the street with his daughter, he started to sing. The daughter of course asked him to stop because he was embarrassing her. I truly do wish I had an answer for you. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Lindsey W	Hun, first I am sure your kids are not embarrassed. If they are seen with you and you obviously look different then people will ask questions. That can be really hard to deal with, particularly if they are not entirely sure of the answers. I am sure they are all really worried you may die, especially as they already lost their mum. Have you sat down and openly and discussed everything with them so they can ask you anything they are worried about, and vice versa. If you are upset by their seeming embarrassment then ask them about it and explain the whole procedure and what is to come so they can prepare themselves. I don't know where you live but in the UK there are many professionals that can offer help and advice to you and your kids. Lots of good wishes to you all Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Cia	Well perhaps they don't feel embarassesd but sorry for you. Many children will not go out in public because they are afraid for there parents health, I would sit down with them and talk to them like adults an dtell them how you feel when you go out. Some kids are scared, that there parent might get worse, and others are embarassed, but that is not very likely and very rare, I might add. Tell them that your baldness is normal and one day they will be bald to, crack some jokes about it so they can see that you are ok. Just see things from there perspective, I HOPE ALL GOES WELL FOR YOU MATE! KICK THE CANCERS ***!! Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

K1	Well, let's start with the fact that (1) the kids' mother (your wife!) already died and left them; now (2) their father, their only living parent, is sick. How would ANY sane child feel in that situation? Terrified, angry, resentful at God/the universe/fate, etc! Children can't easily just "buck up" and "just deal with it" as adults do. Kids process grief at different levels as they get older. I am sure your illness brings up aspects of their grief for their mother, regardless of if she died suddenly or from an illness. Expect that the kids' reactions are related, at least partly, to the MAJOR loss they have already suffered. Your children need to know that you will do everything you can to stay with them. Tell them that explicitly. And if things don't go the way you want them to go, tell them EXPLICITLY who will be caring for them... if you can't stay in this world with them. They need to know they will be taken care of, and that you love them. I was widowed in my 20s with no kids (my late husband died of cancer), so I know the widow thing. And I have a number of widow friends who had kids when their spouses died, and faced health challenges of their own after that. I send my absolute best wishes to you and your kids, for you to get to NED (No Evidence of Disease) - a more truthful term than "remission". Hang in there, and ASK FOR HELP as you need it! There is only strength and no weakness in asking for help when you truly need it! Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

angle2005star	First I want to give you a A+ for been a wonderful father. I also want to say I am going to pray for you and the times of what going on. I know all about what you are going through my mother went through it. I was there for my mother from the beginning to the end. Your kids are to young to know whats really going on with you. I think you should sit down with them and explain to them as clear as possible. Spend as much time together as possible. I think all of you should go to church if you don't already, Read the Bible pray because prayer change everything. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Jenna	maybe they just dont know how to deal with your cancer so they use the excuse of being embarrassed when in reality theyre probably scared. im sure they love you a ton, but just dont know what to feel or how to feel it. i cant imagine your position. i am sorry for you having to go through what you are/have (your wife) good luck and i will pray for you and your kids Jenna Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

texastreasure47	Your children may not have a problem with your appearance as much as they don't know how to handle the stares of other people. I'm sure they have more fears now that the symptoms of your chemotherapy are showing. They could pretend you were okay while you still had your hair and your weight hadn't changed. You really need to consider getting your children into counseling and/or therapy. They have already lost one parent and they would definitly have fears of losing you too. Cancer is a scary thing to go through at any age, but at your children's ages, their imagination can be worse than the disease. Adapting to the physical changes they see and the way other people react to it can be exetremely hard on children. They have to worry about YOUR feelings, their FREINDS feelings and the whole WORLD'S reactions in addition to their own feelings..... that's a pretty big job. Try to find a counselor who has dealt with children facing similar situations. Talk to their pediatrician to get a referral . This will give the children a safe place to talk about their fears and a healthy person who can give them some coping skills and some techniques to use when they are in public with you. I'll bet after a few sessions, your children will be more than willing to go with you reqardless of whether it is in public or not. Good luck and remember that they will love you no matter what you look like. Tex Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No